Holiday Cheer

With exams finally finished it is time to focus on my time off and relaxing. I did pick up a few extra shifts at work, but I want to have time to relax, which is so important! The last 2 weeks with studying and writing exams, I definitely did not take care of myself very well or my place. My plan for the holidays is to bake a bunch of things for lunches next semester, do some exploring of Vancouver and read! It is amazing how much I miss just reading a book. Not one that is assigned for class or textbooks, but a book that I pick to read. I have 6 or 7 books waiting on my shelf to be read. I will say I have been good and not bought anymore books lately. Chapter's is like a magnet. Most times when I go to the mall it sucks me right in and I get lost in the world of all the books I want. The fact that they email me about all the deals that go on does not help either! 

Just a few of my books!

This Christmas will be my third living in Vancouver but the first one I will spend in Vancouver. The last two years I traveled during Christmas. It will be so nice to be home. I will miss spending Christmas with the rest of my family, but I am looking forward to not going anywhere. 
I convinced a friend, last weekend, to go to the Bright Nights Train in Stanley Park. I wanted to go check out at least one Christmas light display this year and this year it was Stanley Park. There were a few food trucks and light displays. Then there was the little train ride. It went around showing more light displays and the terrifying gingerbread man on stilts. There was this part where the train slowed down and there was a person dressed up as a gingerbread man on stilts came toward the train. It was like something from a nightmare. I was surprised I didn't have nightmares after that. And the cutouts of dogs in sweaters driving a sleigh and dancing around a tree, also terrifying. Think dogs playing cards, but a Christmas scene. It was chilly that night. I thought I had worn enough layers, but my hands got cold and once they get cold I am screwed. I do not produce much body heat as it is and even wearing warm gloves my hands froze and then I just could not stop shivering. But it was still so much fun. 

Have a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays everyone!

Song of the Day: Naked by Ella Mai (this song comes care of a dear friend. She told me to listen to it and it is amazing!)

Seeing Happiness

So important to remember!

As I was thinking of what to write for my blog, something that someone dear to me said really resonated with me. I was Snapchatting with a friend and they commented that I look different so, of course, I went straight to my cousin to ask her. She told me that I look happier. Which surprised me. To me, I'm feeling stressed out with the school semester coming to an end and course planning for next semester. But she said that that is good stress, to an extent, and that it's not worry about other people. And that is what resonated with me. I have been dealing with so much of trying to please other people and worry about others, that it was draining me. I think that I've finally come to a place where I can let those people go. I let go of people who were creating drama in my life and who seemed to thrive on it. I am most definitely a helping person. I want to help people, and be there for everyone, but it isn't realistic. I have to take care of myself. Today I feel like I am in such a good place with taking care of me and not worrying so much about what others are doing. I was seeing a guy and we decided to be just friends and I was so worried about how that was going to look and worrying that I wouldn't be able to do it. Until we hung out. The dynamics were a little different, but we are still the same people and it was fun and chill. I realised that I was so caught up in the idea that I needed to be in a relationship to be happy, that when I recognised that and let go of it, I became happier. I was going on dates with a guy who was nice and all, but there just wasn't a click. And I kept going back!! I could see us being friends, but anymore isn't going to happen. Once I finally gave myself permission to let go, I got happier. I love having control and it seems as soon as I let go, I become happier. So I want to give a big shout out to my friend and my cousin for saying I do look different. It made me take a step back and look at myself to see what was different. 

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!! 

Song of the Day: New Rules (Acoustic) by Dua Lipa

Workshop Mania!

Counselling is something that I have wanted to do for many years now. I had the opportunity to attend a couple counselling workshops over the last 2 months and they were fantastic! It was very cool to meet people who are in the counselling field, as well as people who are interested in becoming counsellors. The workshops were free and offered through Stenberg College. My amazing landlord gave me the article in the newspaper about them and I am so glad that I got to go! There were 4 workshops offered each with a different topic.

The first one I went to was called Sexual Awakening. I am someone who gets very nervous talking about sex and I make it super awkward. But that's how I was raised and the culture I was surrounded by. This workshop was fantastic because right off the bat, the man running the workshop made it so it was not taboo. He was so relaxed and presented it as a natural, normal, let's get rid of the stigma attitude. I didn't think that I would get as much out of it as I did. It was fascinating to learn how the presenter works in sex therapy with clients, but I think I took more out of it for my personal life. In not being afraid to say what I like and

Too much text not enough pictures!

don't like and express things to a future partner. That sex is not something to be ashamed of or be afraid to talk about.  For me, being single right now and getting back into the dating life, I think it is incredibly important to be able to talk to your partner about sex. It is not easy and I know I've stumbled along the way so far, but just trying to be open and making it a conversation before is something that I took from this workshop to try. I was raised in a place that had an incredibly high teen pregnancy rate because it was so against the culture to talk about sex or tell your kids how a baby was made. No one learned and when the sex ed classes came up in school, most kids skipped or were exempt for religious reasons and those are mostly the kids who wound up having kids at 16. And this is how I have viewed sex for the longest time. This workshop definitely made me feel like I can be vocal about it. That I can tell a new partner that I don't like something or want to to try things. That it is totally normal. I am so proud of myself for taking that step out of my safety bubble and going to this workshop in the first place, and learning so much about myself was a huge bonus. 

The second workshop I went to was Art Therapy. I was curious to see how art is used in therapy. Art in painting, colouring, music etc. The woman presenting talked about the differences in how a person who is left brained or right brained will present the art. Whether being more defined in lines and colours or being more abstract. She worked mostly with adults in Art Therapy which I didn't really think was a thing. I thought it was used with children and youth. It is very typical to use a form of talk therapy with adults, that it is wonderful to see that there are other options. It isn't always easy to put into words how you are feeling or thoughts. With art you can express so much more, through colours, shapes and designs. I was intrigued with learning more about Art Therapy. I have been interested in Play Therapy since I learned about it in my diploma program and it is something that I want to pursue once I get my Masters. But Art Therapy didn't even cross my mind. The presenter was great and it got me thinking about if I am more left brained or right brained or somewhere in the middle. 

I am so grateful for the opportunity to go to these workshops and learn about other counselling methods. Both of these workshops got me thinking about places to pursue as I work towards my Masters. It is interesting to me to see how much a workshop about counselling can get me to look so much at myself and things I do and things I want to incorporate into my life. 

With all that in mind, have a happy Monday and a wonderful week! I am enjoying the beautiful sunshine while it lasts here in Vancouver!

Song of the Day: Never Going Back Again by Fleetwood Mac (an oldie but a goodie!!)

Back to School I Go

This lovely month of September marked the first part of my journey to become a clinical counsellor. I have been making some sort of excuse for about a year of why I could not go back to school. But those excuses ran out and here I am! I was worried that I would be the old person in my classes or have forgotten how to be a student, but it is amazing how quickly things come back to you and as it turns out I am not the oldest, I am just average. This year is a filler year of classes before I get into the degree program to finish up my Child and Youth Care, then continue on to my Masters. I am taking a random assortment of classes that all sounded really interesting when reading their descriptions and have so far been good. Getting back into the routine of school, work, and life has been a little interesting so far. I am a fairly organised person and my planner is my life. If something is not written in there it drives me crazy. I still carry around a paper planner and I used the calendar app on my phone. 

The best part of going back to school was the school supplies shopping. My sister and I went together since we are both in school again. Office supplies in general is amazing. There are so many choices of ways to be organised. Colour coding, fancy pens and sticky notes galore!! Throughout the years of all my schooling it is neat to see how many more options there are for school supplies. You can personalize and show your personality through everything. Colours, prints, shapes, size, etc. It was so much fun getting to find new items and trying to find old favourites. 

Starting at a new college is scary too. I was so used to the way the Medicine Hat College works, the layout and feeling comfortable there. Being at a new school is definitely hard, but going back a little older and a little wiser helped me to not be nervous to ask people where to find classrooms or talk to the people sitting beside me. I am finding some of the time that I really miss MHC, it felt a little more homey, in the sense that there were so many places to sit and hang out in the college. Where my current school I am not finding that. There's some tables outside that are really nice to sit at when it is not raining but few tables inside are in the cafeteria or you can sit on the big staircase. If I lived closer to the college I would go home during my break, but that's not really possible. But I may just need to do some more exploring of the college and find places to eat my lunch and study. 

I am so glad to be on this journey to continue learning and working towards my final goal. It is going to be a process, but finally knowing what I want to do and going for it is the most rewarding experience. It has taken some trial and error to figure out what I want in life. I would never trade any of those experiences, since I wouldn't be who I am today without them and they have led me to find my passion. 

You are never to old to go back to school and find your passion! Don't settle for anything. We all deserve the best in life, even when it seems like an impossible journey. I am the happiest I have been in a while and I owe it all to some pretty major life events. So follow your heart and trust your gut!

Song of the Day: Big Yellow Taxi by Joni Mitchell

Alberta Holiday

I had good intentions of writing while I have been back at the farm for the last 2 weeks, but alas things didn't go as planned. Most days have been full of adventures and being out of the house all day. I got to spend some time in Medicine Hat with family and friends, as well as my friends and family in my home town. It was great to get to catch up with people that I haven't seen for almost 2 years. It is amazing how much can happen in that time! 
I only spent a few days in Medicine Hat and it went by so fast! I somehow managed to fit in time to see almost everybody. Sorry to those I missed! I somehow managed to pick the hottest days to be in the Hat, but it was still a great time. Went on walks along the coulee, had a picnic, went to some of my favourite restaurants and managed not to get lost once! 
On my way back to the farm from Medicine Hat, I stopped in Lethbridge to see my cousin,
aka minitwin. She gave me an amazing new haircut. Whenever I feel like doing something drastic to my hair she is the one I call. This time I cut almost 10 inches off. I went from incredibly long hair to short hair. Well short for me. I haven't had short hair since I was 17. I have been growing it out since then (9 years, but who's counting). Wish I could have spent more time with her, but unfortunately work gets in the way.
The rest of my time was spent on the farm. I got to see my friend and niece for a day. It was great to see them! I can't believe she is 6 already. She's getting too big! I am so glad that we have remained friends for so long and I get to be a part of their lives. 

Logan Pass

One of the highlights of the trip was getting to play with my brother's new kitten. Everybody that knows me knows that I love cats. I am a crazy cat lady without actually owning a cat of my own. His kitten is so cute! She acts like he never feeds her and tries to drink out of any cup that has been put down or is in your hand. She isn't always the smartest either. She got her head stuck in a cup. But she is so cute it makes up for it.

Kayaks!

I got to go motorbiking with my parents to Waterton and over Logan Pass. My dad's Moto Guzzi is so nice to ride, even though it covered my pants with dust. I've never had a bike cover me in dust so horribly. I was wearing dark blue jeans and they were not blue by the end of the trip. We also went to Many Glacier and got to ride the boat and I finally found a ring similar to the one I got there when I was 7. It has a turquise stone and is my favourite ring but has seen better days. I went to every gift shop while going over Logan and in Waterton but no luck. Many Glacier had 5 or 6 to choose from. I had a hard time choosing which one I liked the best. We also took the kayaks up to Cameron Lake in Waterton. I have not kayaked in a very long time. My arms were pretty sore after. It was a fairly calm day in Cameron Lake terms for kayaking and it was great. We didn't go all the way across but most of the way and I didn't even end up in the water once! Which is a pretty big accomplishment for me. When I went white water kayaking I spent more time in the water than the boat. 
This has been a fantastic trip, but I am very ready to get back to Vancouver. I have a couple weeks before school starts and I get busy with school and work.

Have a wonderful week!

Song of the day: Call Me (Feat. MIMI) by NEIKED

Beach Day Everyday!!!

Okay so maybe not everyday... But since I was I was let go from my job a couple weeks ago I have been enjoying the time off to explore more of the beautiful Vancouver area, which has included the beach among other things.

I thought losing my job would be the worst thing ever but it has actually turned into an amazing opportunity. I have been wanting to go back to school but always making the excuse about how would I do it working a full-time and part-time job. Now that I don't have that excuse anymore I have applied to go back! I have picked up more shifts at my part time job for the summer and still making time to go out to events around town or just wander around.

Barnet Marine Park

These last few months have been some of the craziest, most confusing, hardest times of my life so far. I focused so much on my partner, trying to help them, but sadly had to end the relationship as they were not willing to get help and I was getting angry and bitter. It was a hard decision to make since I only want the best for them and want them to work towards their recovery. There is only so much you can do for someone. And after being told to leave and pushed away for the last 2 months I couldn't take it anymore.

Anyways... I have loved getting to explore Vancouver while I am discovering myself again. I have learned so much about myself and can't wait to get started on this next adventure of school. I am definitely in need of some good in my life after so much crap. One thing I have learned is that sometimes you have to make your own good while crap is being thrown at you. Even if that means Googling where the closest beach is and just going there to read my book!

I have been going to more of the Meetup Group events and meeting new people. As much of an introvert as I am, staying home or going to things by myself all the time I realised how much I do need to be around people every once in a while. There is only so much you can talk to yourself or text people. Since most people that I know are at work during the day or live in a different province. So not exactly easy to do things with them. 

I hope everyone has a wonderful summer day! Remember to wear sunscreen! Don't become a tomato like me.

Song of the Day: Blessed by Brett Dennen

6 Little Letters

Hiking. A simple 6 letter word that basically means I'm going to die. Not literally but feel like death. Covered in sweat and dirt with aching muscles from not being used. This was the steepest hike I have yet to do and we didn't even go to the very top. We stopped part way up as my hiking partner was not feeling the best. I was absolutely fine with the decision. It was a gorgeous day to be in the mountains and exploring nature just not when you don't feel good.

A hard part for me was my backpack. As this was a much harder and steeper hike, I had to bring more water and snacks. Which entails a heavier bag. Carrying 3 water bottles, snacks, bug spray, sunscreen and all the layers of clothing I was taking off while climbing made a very heavy bag. I was told that it would be chilly at the top so to wear layers. But only maybe 10 minutes in I was already taking layers off. It did get a little chillier where we stopped but we didn't reach the snow line.  

I have found that hiking brings me some peace. It's a few hours spent in nature, pushing my body to its limits, while letting my mind wander to all sorts of places that it doesn't get to go in my everyday life. It's sort of like meditating. But instead of sitting still I'm sweating my ass off. It's the best of both worlds. Getting to see what my body is capable and also my mind. I find the more it wanders the less I realise how far I have gone or how hard parts were. The more I focus on actually hiking the harder the hike becomes. I mean there are times when I have to focus on the hike like when I'm climbing over things or trying not to slide down a steep decline. It's all a balance, like so many things in life. 

I feel so lucky to be living in a place that offers so many different opportunities to be in

nature. Whether it is climbing a mountain, taking a walk in the park or sitting on the beach. All are at my fingertips and I couldn't ask for more. 

I'm having to make some extremely difficult decisions in my life right and getting to get out in nature has helped me to figure some of them out. It has helped me to find what matters the most to me and how to make myself happy again. Pushing myself to my absolute limits has helped me to discover what I am capable of. I never thought I would be able to do some of the things I have. I have loved deeper than I ever thought I could and lost the person I never imagined losing. While at the same time finding that it's okay to walk away from that person, when you have done all that you can to work things out but it can't be one sided. 

I have never been much for meditation but I am embracing it. It may not be in the conventional way but who says there is only one way to meditate. Meditation is a personal thing and I've found a way that works for me and that's what's most important. 

Song of the Day: Lifeboat by Janet Devlin

Coffee & Cats

This looks like my parents cat

A couple weekends ago I decided to check out the Catfe. I was super excited about getting to play with cats while drinking coffee. Sounds like my kind of place. Skip to a few hours later when I actually get there and it was not at all what I had built it up to be or how much the website made it sound wonderful. It was expensive to get into since you have to pay an admission fee and then a stupid amount for coffee. Added bonus you can only go in for an hour and have to make a reservation, they do have walk in spots but you can't always get in at those times. I did go in and there are a bunch of rules about how to interact with the cats, which I understand, but basically only touch the cats on the head and leave them alone were the basic gist of the rules. For the most part all the cats sat on the highest shelves so that nobody could pet them or they were sleeping (which you are not allowed to wake them up, one of the rules). So I paid $13 to drink coffee and watch cats. The few that were awake, moving around everyone else circled. I ended up going down the street to a different cafe and spending a couple hours there reading my book and enjoying a decently priced cup of coffee in a cute place. I feel like I'd rather go to the SPCA where you can actually play with the cats. Only problem there is I might try to come home with all the cats. Good thing my landlord is allergic and I'm not allowed pets. I'm sure my man would love if I showed up at his door with a cat asking him to keep. He might actually be okay with that. Maybe I should try that....

Coffee from Prado

Long story short I love cats. Catfe was a disappointment. Rather not be limited in the time I have at a coffee shop.

<-- They made my coffee look so pretty!



Song of the Day: Shortie by Hannah Georgas

Book Club Shenanigans

I joined a book club!! Those that know me know that I love to read and will pretty much read anything. It is a small group of about 10 lovely ladies. We had our first meeting in April to discuss what kind of books we wanted to read and make some suggestions. All of us read books from all sorts of genres so we went with picking a book from each. We picked 10 books and drew from a hat what order we will read them in. The first book up is The Night Circus. I am about half way through it and it is fantastic!! We plan to meet about once a month to discuss the books and relax and just hang out really. I have never been part of a book club before and I am really excited to read books that I may not have chosen myself. Most of the 10 books we chose I have never heard of before. I don't really have a place for books at my place so they have started to just get piled randomly. They are my decorations. One day when I have a bigger place and my own furniture, a bookshelf is going to be a definite must. I debated on just going to the library and checking out the books, but being me, I decided to head to Chapter's and buy them. If I enjoy the book there is a very likely chance I will read it over and over again. If I don't like it then it will go in my donation pile. Books are never a waste of money to me. If I didn't have to worry about bills and such, my pay cheques would all go to Chapter's.
I am very excited to continue to go to Book Club and get to know the ladies better. I have still found it a little difficult to make friends here and I am hoping that with a smaller group that meets regularly I will build better friendships. With everything happening in my life right now, having something to look forward to is a good feeling. I love having something that is just mine. So much of everything I have right now is intertwined with my man. His friends became my friends, which isn't a bad thing in any shape or form, but I need things that are just mine. 
I need to finish reading this book soon as the next meet up is coming up! It's a little hard to have a deadline to finish a book, but at the same time it's kinda nice. Makes me take time and focus on something else for a while. I'm hoping the sun will come out so I can go read in the park! 

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!

Song of the Day: Write It in the Sky by Kina Grannis

These Last Weeks

These last few weeks have been some of the hardest weeks of my life. Someone very near and dear to me is struggling with depression and it got incredibly bad. They would not let anyone in or talk to anyone for about a week. I was the first person they reached out to and allowed in the door of their apartment. For 2 weeks I was the only contact for this person. As much as I tried to get them to get help or talk to other family or friends, it was a firm no. There was many days of crying and feelings of hopelessness from this person. They did not feel they deserved the love and support they were receiving from the people who love them. About a week ago we were able to get this loved one to agree to start looking at options for getting help. We called the mental health services and they said it would take a month to get through the process and suggested we take them to the Emergency Room. We were able to get them to go but once there things did not go as they thought it would. They did not realise that there would be no leaving the hospital once we went in. Having some of the knowledge that I do from my schooling and where I work, I was all to aware of the fact that they would not be coming home with me that night. I didn't tell them that because I knew that if I had they would never have agreed to go. I question everyday whether that was the right thing to do or not. Now my loved one is in the Mental Health Ward at the hospital. Getting the help they need and deserve. It is amazing to see the transformation a week has made. They are eating and gaining weight again. They do not look so hopeless anymore. They may have been resistant to get help before but are now embracing the help and trying to think of the future and what they can do once they leave the hospital. I am not usually one to say that medication is always the answer but in this case the medication has helped so much. They got their new diagnosis and are working on learning more and asking questions on what they can do to live with it and work with it. After hearing this person talk about ending things and only having to outlive their parents, hearing them talk about the future is a relief. I can't imagine the things that have gone through their mind for the last 10 plus years that they have been hiding all the things they have been struggling with, but I am glad they decided to get help and as they say not have to hide anything anymore. 
It is the hardest thing to go to the hospital and walk into the ward to have to see the person you love, but I know that I did all I could at home for them and now they are getting the help I couldn't give. There is a very long road ahead with many up and downs to come, but I will be there for this person even after them yelling at me to leave them and give up on them.
Sometimes I find it funny that I can work with youth who have drug problems and mental health issues and not let it affect me. I can go to work and then when I leave work they aren't my concern anymore (that sounds harsh), but I mean that it doesn't impact my life. I can separate work and my life. Dealing with this in my personal life I've been a disaster. Crying, angry, sad and every other emotion under the sun. The fact that my schooling drilled into our brains about self-care has been my life saver. I have to take time out for me. Yes I want to be there for this person, but I can't help them and be there for them if I don't take care of myself as well. I have never missed my guitar so much. I keep going back and forth with the thought of just going to buy a new one, but my guitar has so much meaning to me (my grandmother bought it for me) that I can't bring myself to get another one. Music is still my sanity but I've had to use it in other forms then playing. My other forms of self-care have had to replace my love of guitar for now. 
As much as seeing my loved one in the hospital hurts, I know that they are in a safe place and working towards getting better. The worst feeling is knowing how understaffed and underfunded mental health programs are. The nurses have been amazing and I will forever be grateful to them. I don't think they hear very often how amazing they really are. They are doing the things that I can't do and other can't do for their loved ones. 
It has been a hard and trying last while and I am starting to be able to see the good in everything. There was a lot of darkness and worry about what could happen when I wasn't there and had to go to work. But things are looking up and I am ready to start embracing this new direction that life has decided to take me. I know that I have a lot to work on myself as well, learning about their diagnosis and what comes with it, but also how to trust them again. There was many lies told to cover up what was going on in their mind. It will be something we will have to work on together and it will take time. I also have to work on forgiving them. I don't know right now what that will look like. Or how to do it. I'm not even sure what to forgive them for with all that has happened. It is another thing that will take time and will be something we work on together. So much has happened that I need time to process things and get things straight in my mind. They have been open and honest with any questions that have been asked and that makes things a little easier but sometimes the questions and answers are the hard to ask and hear. There are still many tears, but getting answers has helped. 
There are many campaigns out now for ending the stigma on mental health and I hope that people realise that they are important. Mental health is a real thing and it shouldn't been seen in just a negative light. After dealing with the hospital in Emergency I can see why people don't want to get help. We were there for 10 plus hours before my loved one was admitted. And they were the longest, most stressful hours because my loved one had to tell their story 4 or more times to different people and it was already causing them anxiety just leaving the house. I wish there was a way to make people realise that mental health is just as important as cancer research or any other medical research. It is your brain, it's incredibly important. 
Thank you to all who have been a support to me in this time and I am sorry for my long absence on my blog! 

All my love,

Sarah

Song of the Day: Hold Onto Me by Mayday Parade

Wet, Muddy, Cold

Waterfall on the trail

Last weekend my brother in law and I went hiking. It was the longest hike I have been on yet, 13 km! Forecast called for rain so I layered up, put on my rain jacket and new hiking shoes. We drove out to Buntzen Lake for our hike. It wasn't raining yet when we got there. It was cool and cloudy but nice for a hike. As we started out the ground was a little wet and snowy but still nice. About 3 km into the hike it started to rain a little, no big deal. I was sadly very mistaken at that point. It started pouring rain. I have never been that wet in my life. I found out my rain jacket isn't actually waterproof. I was soaked through 3 layers of clothing. At about kilometer 10 the trail was just a big, muddy mess. I tried to step around this one mud pit, as my brother in law had but with my little short legs my foot slipped right into it. So now not only was I soaking wet, I was muddy. At this point I was miserable. I was having fun up to then. I didn't mind being wet until my feet got wet. The trail had turned into more of a river then a trail and there wasn't much choice but to walk in the water, which was melting snow so freezing cold. The trail was snowy and wet and muddy in parts. 
This hike definitely pushed me to my limits. You can't turn around because the trail is a loop you just have to keep pushing yourself to keep going. For only the third hike of the season I am incredibly proud of myself. I may have been exhausted, wet and muddy, but I did it. It  was totally worth it too. I now have a goal for this summer to hike all 3 peaks of Mount Seymour. Last summer I did the first peak and I was dying. That was a 9 km hike. I live in an amazing place with so many different places to hike and beautiful areas to see that I want to just go and do it all! I never thought I would enjoy hiking as much as I do. I may go with my brother in law, but we don't really talk. We are both in our own little worlds. He is much taller than me so he is usually up the trail a bit from me then waits for me to catch up then goes again. Gets a little ways away then waits. It works for us and we both enjoy it. I don't go on every hike with him if he wants to do one for speed because I slow him down so much. But as I hike more hopefully I will get stronger and my cardio will improve. As much as I workout on my own and walk to work everyday my cardio is still awful. 

This raven really wanted my snack

I can't wait for the weather to get warmer and be able to do more hiking and different trails. With all the snow we got this winter it will be a bit before we can do the hikes further up the mountains. So for now it's just hikes closer to home. 

Have a wonderful week everyone!!

Song of the Day: Do It Now by Jasmine Thompson

Experimental Baking

As most people know I love to bake and try new recipes. Living in Vancouver and making new friends I have had to adjust my baking style. I still love to make all the gooey, ooey, unhealthy cookies, cakes, you name it. The people I have met are mostly vegetarian, vegan or have allergies. This has taken my baking to experimental levels. 
Last night I went to a house warming party for some friends and they are a mix of vegetarians, vegans, and meatatarians (otherwise known as people who just eat food). Being me I couldn't just bring a bottle of wine and call it a day. I spent my day baking vegan desserts. I found some really simple recipes on Pinterest and they turned out fantastic. I made a peanut butter cookie, peanut butter coconut bar and for those who weren't vegan cookies n' cream cookies. I was a little nervous making all the desserts, as I had never made any of them before. I found the substitutes for the vegan cookies not all that strange or out there. I did have to get vegan butter, different flour since they were also gluten free and get an egg replacement. I was worried that it would change the texture or flavour with the substitutes as I love peanut butter cookies. It didn't. You wouldn't have known they were vegan. I now have a bunch of ingredients to make vegan and gluten free baked goods. My sister is gluten free now which is a bonus as I can try out some recipes. Fail on my part for not even thinking of taking pictures of all my baking!
I used to think that vegan or gluten free recipes would be complicated and require tons of different ingredients that would be hard to find or expensive and make them taste like cardboard. But after experimenting and going to restaurants that are vegan, it is not true. Yes, I am sure there are some that don't taste great and I know I've made things that aren't good without being vegan or anything. 
This experimenting has opened my eyes to trying new foods, not just desserts. No I will probably never stop eating meat, even if I don't cook it very often myself. But there are definitely options out there for those who make the choice to change their diets or have no choice but to. 
As my family has some stomach health issues I am enjoying eating whatever I can, while I can. Seeing how much work my sister has to do to find a restaurant that has gluten free and vegetarian options for her and my mom not being able to eat many things either, exploring these baking options is giving me so much appreciation for being able to eat anything. I mean I am a super picky eater in the first place, but I can pick things off or ask to not have them at a restaurant. Some people are not that fortunate. 
If any one has some recommendations for recipes to try I would love to hear them!! Whether dessert or meal. 
I am slowly expanding the few meals that I can cook, but I have more fails then wins.
Have a wonderful week everybody!!

Song of the Day: Ghosts by Gabrielle Aplin

Happy Day of Love!

Happy Valentine's Day!!!

I may be a few days late, but I hope that everybody got to spend the day with the people they love! Valentine's Day always seems to be centered around boyfriends/girlfriends/spouses. I think it should be more about spending time with those you love not just your significant other. That being said, I did get to spend a wonderful day with my man. We both had the Monday off of work for Family Day and decided to celebrate that day instead of after work on the 14th. 
We were super fortunate that the weather was so nice on the 13th. We went down to Granville Island and walked around the market and got food. I had never been there before and I was so excited to see it. There are some really cute shops and the market was full of food! We walked around for almost an hour, at least it felt like that long with how crowded the place was. There were so many places to choose from and I kept looking at all the pastry and dessert places instead of lunch ideas. We finally did decide on getting Chinese food. Not all that exciting but it was really good. We didn't spend a lot of time there and decided instead of taking the bus back we would walk across the bridge to the Skytrain station. Along the way we stopped for coffee at a little coffee shop, that I can't for the life of me remember the name of, but it had a fantastic patio that we sat and drank our coffee on. 
Instead of going out for a fancy dinner, we cooked dinner together. Before we left on our adventure, we got out the handy crock pot and put all ingredients in to make honey garlic chicken. I am no cook, but I love to bake. I am so thankful that my man lets me experiment with cooking and baking on him. He can cook so he usually takes over when I attempt at cooking anything. How I survive on my own is still a mystery. Anyways, when we got back we made the Parmesan baked potato halves and rice. This meal actually turned out so good!! It is definitely one I will make again and it was super easy. I had made dessert the day before and made cinnamon buns. I was going to make a cake or something but we never seem to finish a cake when I make it so I went with something that I knew would get eaten. That recipe could use some practice and refining, but they were still yummy. 

I made myself one too!

My man spoiled me with a beautiful bouquet of pink roses and a box of chocolates. The classiest part of it all was that he didn't have a vase or pitcher to put the flowers in, so they were in an A&W mug. Which probably isn't any better than the cheese whiz jar I have them in at my house. Me being a crafty person made him a Sharpie mug. Well I had attempted one and it just wasn't working out so he hasn't gotten it yet. I finally got it how I wanted it so he will get it this weekend. I find him to be incredibly hard to buy for as he's picky and even sometimes I feel the random little crafty things I make him he doesn't like. Even when he tells me he loves them. But coffee mugs don't need to match (his words) when I was telling him about his present. 

I can't espresso how much you bean to me

All in all it was a wonderful day and I am so grateful to have got to spend it with my man.

Have a wonderful weekend everybody!!

Song of the Day: Kiss Me by Ed Sheeran

Hawaiian Adventure

I spent my Christmas and New Year's in beautiful Hawaii. Not a bad way to escape the weird weather that we have had here in Vancouver. With almost a month and a half of snow and ice it was just too much. 

Hawaii was amazing. We rented a condo in Lahaina, Maui and it was pretty sweet. We had a beautiful cove just steps from our door that was semi private. You would not know it was there if you weren't staying around it. This cove had spectacular snorkeling. There were so many turtles!! In the evening if you went out you would see at least 7 on any night. They would swim up to the rocks and sit in the sun during the day sometimes too. It was interesting and some of them were huge. I am not that big of a fan of snorkeling so I mostly swam around on the boogie board. We went to the beach just down the road with the boogie boards and would ride the waves up the shore. It was crazy fun. You could get some good distance up the beach on some of the bigger waves. Only downside was that you would have sand everywhere. In every crack and crevice. My hair was more sand the one day than it was

Hair full of sand!

hair (took 3 washes to get the sand out of my hair). My brother took some really good videos of us riding the boogie boards up the beach and getting pummeled by the waves when you weren't on them. If you laid on your back you could ride the waves up the beach without a boogie board too!!  I drank so much salt water those days, which tastes really nasty, but clears out your sinuses fantastically. 

Black Sand Beach

We spent one whole day driving up the Road to Hana. It was about a 10 hour car ride round trip in the third row of the Santa Fe we rented. Doesn't sound that bad until you realize that the third row is pretty much in the trunk of the car and the seat sits on the ground. I am short and my knees weren't quite to my chest but it was not the most comfortable ride of my life. The drive was beautiful and we saw some amazing views. We stopped at a lava tube that you can walk down in. It was a little scary since it is pitch black inside and all you have is a little flashlight. At one part you have to duck down to get to the next section. If you are claustrophobic you would not want to do that, but it opens up about 3 steps after that. It was cool to walk around in. We stopped at the black sand beach as well. It's not really sand though. It is tiny lava rocks that have been smoothed down by the waves. It was a stunningly beautiful beach. It was really tiny, but still very neat to see. The scariest part of the whole drive was when we actually got to the town of Hana. I am sure most people will think my family is crazy, but bare with me. We were terrified of the hill people. It's a hilly place and small town, but we felt like we didn't want to be there after dark. You would just disappear. There were so many abandoned vehicles that were burnt up and it just felt like a place that you don't go to at night. Even the people at the worst beach side, food vendor thing (I can't classify it as a restaurant) were super weird and rude. Food was not very good there either and they didn't have anything that was one the menu. Everything that we ordered they were out of, so we got a really crappy meal. It was an adventure to say the least about the Road to Hana. I understand why they have shirts that say "I survived the Road to Hana" though they should say I survived the hill people of Hana. 

A major highlight of the trip was going on a helicopter ride around Maui. Maui is a stunningly beautiful place and to get to see it from a helicopter is breathtaking. We got to see the valley where a scene from Jurassic Park was filmed, which was super cool since I am a big fan of those movies. It was neat to see the island from up above and see parts of the island that you can't drive to and waterfalls that you wouldn't know were there if you weren't in a helicopter.  I was sitting by the window and I had my dad's camera so I got to take some very cool pictures. 

We spent one morning on a boat, whale watching. We were there during the beginning of the whale migration to Hawaii for mating season. We were fortunate to see quite a number of whales and some dolphins decided to come visit us too! One of the whales swam right under the boat. From a distance the whales looked huge, but when it swam under the boat you could see just how big it was. I was standing at the very back of the boat and saw it swim out. I was blown away seeing how huge it was. I enjoy seeing animals in their natural habitat. I don't like zoos. I feel like they are cruel. Animals shouldn't be in cages. Anyways little off topic there, but oh well. 

My brother in law, brother and I did go for a hike while we were there as well! We went to the Haleakala Crater and hiked down a ways. It was strange in the fact that there was frost on the ground up that high and we found an icicle! The landscape at the crater was bizarre. It looked like you were on Mars. Most of the dirt was red and there wasn't much for vegetation in some areas. Going down the crater was the easy part, coming back up I nearly didn't make it. It was cold up there like 0°C, I was wearing a hoodie and wind breaker.

Hiking back up I was down to just my workout tank top. The looks and comments I got from all the people going down was ridiculous. There was sweat pouring off my face I was sweating so badly. If you felt my arms they were cold to the touch but I was just sweating. The really cool thing about Haleakala is that it was craved by the mist/fog that rolls in and out of it. As we were walking it was like walking into a cloud and then suddenly it would be gone. It was fascinating. I am very glad my brother in law got my butt out of bed bright and early to go check it out. 

Most of the trip we just chilled out and relaxed. It was a much needed break from the craziness of this last year. I was stressed to the max trying to find a new job and being miserable at the one I was working. It just happened that before we left I got a new job and that relieved a little stress. I am a firm believer in time off. Everybody needs a vacation to just get away and not worry. 

Reading by the pool

Have a wonderful weekend everybody!!  

Song of the Day: You Make It Real by James Morrison

New Job, New Year, New Hair

I find it hard to believe that 2016 is over. This year has gone by so fast and so many things have happened. I moved out on my own, met an amazing man, worked my butt off, got a brand new haircut, and I just got a new job that I will be starting in January. To end off 2016 I will be spending Christmas and New Year's in Hawaii with my family. I am so excited to see my family and to get to go on holidays. 

I have been applying for jobs for quite some time now and it was surprising how fast the process went with this new job. I applied and 2 days later I had an interview and the next week I was offered the job. I am super excited to be starting a new chapter in my life with this job. As much as I will miss the kids that I work with, I am very ready to move on. I can't wait to start this new job and get to meet new people and continue to work in the industry that I love.

It seems that Christmas is when I do something drastic to my hair. Last Christmas I got an undercut, which I am growing out since it was so much work to keep up. This time I went from having hair that is almost all one length to having tons of layers. My undercut is still growing out so it makes it interesting to style my hair, but oh well. I am loving my new haircut and feel like it makes me look more grown up. 

I am looking forward to everything 2017 is going to bring. I am not usually one for New Year's Resolutions but this year I really want to try to do more hiking. My brother-in-law is really into hiking and I have gone a few times with him and loved it. I may not be in the best shape and definitely slow him down when I go since I am over a foot shorter than him, but it will take going to get in better shape.

Happy New Year everybody!!!

Song of the Day: Angel by Jack Johnson